Walls of unconscious hypocrisy proved to be the means
I used in my life’s actions, krafts and skills.
I was sure for my kind intentions
and had never hoped to be mistaken, misunderstood.
What a pity, there wasn’t anyone eager to get into the ‘cosmos’
of those means and their intentions!
Remorse obsess me hard. I complain much
that I was not ever given the chance
to explain meanings, intentions, means and rest ones.
Finally, I found, the misfortune,
myself encaged in the enclave of My Own Walls,
and have bitterly to regret,
that I did not abhor in time to the shape
of the appearance into which
I left the essence of my being to be transformed
at someone I do not recognize as myself.
Ashamed now to see all that deserving to be laughed at,
I ditect the worst:
I had shaped out a second unnatural self
which seemed like having captured my real self
and does not still leave it free to become itself.
It does not allow me take off that mask, I discover I wear,
and leave the authentic person openly shown to be.
An urgent gathering of new build-elements daunts me,
while the elements used once now seem strange to me.
And that will be, I predict, the damnation to suffer henceforth:
To see a parody unfolding in front of my new eyes:
myself, my presumed me, as a Stranger, an Alien,
walking in front and instead, I fear, of my own id
and known opposite comers
eager to recognize that Alien Stranger
and to ignore Me,
the one recognized as my id by Me
and not the one projected
ouside My Own Walls as Me.
Deserving, I confess, in retrospect,
the human nature’s vengeance.
My Own Walls
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