Why Didn’T I Brace Myself?

why does it hurt
for I knew it was coming
I should have braced myself
instead I denied it
hoping my instincts were wrong
but they were not
for this past week or so
I sat and watched his love for me fade
slowly fading to nothing
I could not think of one thing to make it better
I could not stop the fading, not alone
but I knew
he was ready to move on
so I just sat and tried to enjoy the little time we had left
it was the not knowing that hurt
with every I love you I thought will this be our last
with every conversation I thought will this be our last as lovers
and we eventually reached that conversation
the one I had come to dread
the one that ended our love