Why have I never been able to write about you?
Having as many hooks in my heart as any lover,
And now in exile from your nuzzling kisses,
Jammy hands and temper tantrums,
An unexpected glimpse of a chubby grin
Reminds me of my out-cast state,
Self-imposed, but no less a distance.
Why have I never been able to wrap
Any of these feelings you startle up
In a musical phrase?
Unable to say your own heart,
But so willing to give it,
I have felt ashamed before your trust,
When I could say my heart so glibly
But never hand it over,
Knowing you would leave
And take mine with you.
In silence then I served,
And tried to learn to give as children do,
Without deals or bargains
Struck on love’s account.
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