Don’T Ask Me To Write A Poem

Poems are tricky expressions
It’s obvious you’re oblivious to that
Put one single word out of line
And the whole thing could go kersplat!
Similes are as difficult as quantum physics
Metaphors freeze my brain
Alliteration makes me mad
Personification beats me up with a cane
And rhyming! Don’t talk about rhyming!
Don’t even dream of mentioning that
Now, what shall I rhyme “that” with?
Wombat, muskrat or doormat?
I’ve had my share of verbal irony
When I’m told writing poems are a walk in the park
Sarcasm is oh, so fun!
Poetry sure is not about shooting in the dark
Onomatopoeia makes me hiss
Oxymorons are purely disgusting
Assonances send a sharp blast to my head
Repetitions are boring, are boring
Don’t ask me to write a poem
Don’t tell me to dish out a verse
Don’t beg me to pull out a sonnet
Like I’ve hidden it somewhere in my purse
Don’t expect me to break out in rhyme
It’s not like I have them stocked in my shelf
If you need a poem that badly
Why don’t you write one yourself?