Sonnet: I Want To Be My Good Self, God

I fight a battle lone against great foes;
Some known and seen; others unknown, unseen;
They are the prime cause of my umptine woes;
If God wills only, improve will this scene.

Sometimes, I feel, I should have given up,
Long, long ago and turned to selfish ways;
But what to do, I’ve drunk the bitter cup;
So oft; I’m waiting for my better days.

Half of my life is almost gone by now;
What has the other half in store for me?
Let suff’rings come, I’ve learnt to them too love;
My heart and soul yearn for Eternity.
Let success come or failures strike me dead;
I will remain myself with my God-head.